I found a wedding venue I love that will let us start as early as we want, but the bad news is we have to stop the music by 10 with NO exceptions. I really wanted our wedding to go until midnight, but the venue is not budging! Should I find another venue or just start earlier?- Mary
I hear this frustration A LOT from brides. You want the party to go late into the night, but you’re restricted by how late the venue will allow your reception to go until. I was totally one of those brides. We were lucky enough to have a venue that let us go until 2 a.m. if we wanted, but the thing is, nobody wants to stay at a wedding that late. So, just how long should a wedding reception last? And what would your wedding timeline look like if it has to end by 10 p.m.?
The first thing you’ll want to figure out is a total length of time for your wedding ceremony/reception. The magic number for a ceremony and reception is 6 hours total. That would be an hour (ideally 30 minutes or less) for the ceremony, an hour for cocktails immediately following the ceremony, then 4 hours for dinner/dancing. This schedule will change a bit if you’re having your ceremony and reception in different locations (if you’re short on time this is another big plus to having them in the same place). However, assuming you are having your ceremony and reception at the venue and you have a hard stop of 10 p.m., here’s how I would plan your wedding timeline:
4:30 p.m.: Ceremony starts (however you would say 4 p.m. on your wedding invitation, as you always want to give 1/2 hour for guests to arrive).
5:00: Cocktail hour with passed hors d’oeuvres
6:00 : Guests asked to take their seats
6:15 : Grand Entrance. Introductions of couple and wedding party by DJ or MC
6:30-6:40 : First Dance/Father of the Bride/Mother of the Groom dances
6:45 : First course served
7:00 : Toasts
7:15 : Second course served
7:30 : Dancing begins
8:30 : Cake cutting
8:40 : Parents of the Bride and/or Bride/Groom Speech
8:45 : Cake served
10:00 : Event ends. Make your grand exit!
Now, admittedly, at 10 p.m. most of your friends will want to keep the celebration going, and that’s great! This is when you call Uber and take the party back to your hotel bar, or friend’s house, or other favorite club or bar and keep dancing until 3 a.m. if you want! And even though a 10 p.m. cut-off means you’ll have had to end the big day earlier than you wanted, you’ll still get the FULL 6 hours you would have had if your venue let you go until midnight. You’re just starting a bit earlier! And honestly in hindsight, even though my wedding went until 1 a.m., I can tell you that there were only 10Â of us left, and we could have easily taken the party to a bar a few hours earlier and had JUST as great of a time. So if I were you I would stick with the venue you love and don’t worry about the time. You’ll have an amazing wedding no matter what!
How Long Do Weddings Last? And More Questions…Answered!
When planning your wedding (or if you’re planning on attending a wedding!) there are a few questions you might have about how long they last. Here are the most common questions and answers.
This can vary based on cultural traditions and of course your own personal preferences (and budget). For example, Indian weddings can include events across 2-5 days, with the main ceremony spanning 1-3 hours, and the post-wedding rituals and reception lasting anywhere from 4-6 hours. For traditional Western weddings, however, the timeline is shorter. The average wedding ceremony and reception runs 4-6 hours combined.
2-3 hours is the average amount of time allotted at a wedding reception for dancing. But if you don’t have this amount of time at your venue, don’t worry! You can continue the party afterwards at a nearby bar or club, or even someone’s house. Also keep in mind you do not have to have dancing at a wedding reception. Couples might instead opt to have another fun activity like karaoke. Or, you might opt to throw a more low-key brunch or cocktail party.
While this is completely up to the couple throwing the wedding, it’s a good idea for an evening wedding to end between 11 p.m.-1 a.m. You’ll find that a fair number of guests are ready to go home by 11 a.m., and if you’re paying for extra venue hours it might not be worth it for just a handful of night owls who want to stay on the dance floor.
The general rule of thumb is to wait until the cake cutting happens to say your goodbyes to the newlyweds.
How long
Have a wedding question? E-mail us at hello [at] womangettingmarried.com!
See More: Here’s What My 1 a.m. Wedding Timeline Looked Like
All products featured on Woman Getting Married are independently selected by our editors. However, we may earn affiliate revenue on this article and commission when you buy something. Learn more.
Your friends may be happy for you but almost none of them want to spend six hours at your wedding and after party.